Let's try that again

No gym yesterday but I am going to try again today for around noon-ish. Nothing on the go for today so it shouldn't be a problem. Never even typed a word for that fic. I got all caught up surfing the www for nice pics of JM and playing my guitar. I really have to stop letting me distract myself, but JM is such a lovely distraction. It seems that I am getting to be a bit of a quiz junky. I actually took a quiz that would tell me what kind of butt I am. Maybe I'll add some of the stranger quizzes I've come across to my journal later; why should I have all the fun?

Plans changed

Unfortunately, the gym will have to wait until tomorrow. The electrician decided he wanted to finish wiring the basement today and my small window of opportunity went out the window. On the bright side, the basement can be completely dry walled now. I can't wait until it's finished. It's half of a house out of commission. Time to get started on that fic.

Plans changed

Unfortunately, the gym will have to wait until tomorrow. The electrician decided he wanted to finish wiring the basement today and my small window of opportunity went out the window. On the bright side, the basement can be completely dry walled now. I can't wait until it's finished. It's half of a house out of commission. Time to get started on that fic.

Agenda for today

Ok, today I get my ass back to the gym after an extended hiatus. I'm actually looking forward to getting back. I've lost most of the weight that I wanted to before I started on the weight training. Gonna try and tone up and get some definition. Having a pool and knowing that you will be spending most of your summer in a bathing suit is definitely motivation. So, that means that I have about 4 months to get this body of mine built. It's hard to believe that in only 4 months time the sun will be shining brightly and the flowers blooming since all I see out my window is snow, snow, and more snow. Thank god it's not as cold as yesterday. It was -21C, without the wind-chill, in the morning, burrrr. After the gym I plan on getting the first chapter of my fic finished or at least started. I'm also going to start hunting for someone who will be willing to beta read it for me. I think I may ask estepheia if she knows of anyone who might be interested. Lastly, I will have to seriously consider getting this place in order. It's starting to look quite dumpy around here. Oh, how I loathe housework.

A little fan fic

So, I thought that I'd try my hand at a little fan fic but was waiting for a plot to come to me. I finally came up with one that didn't seem too lame. I think that I may be going about it a little ass backwards though as I wrote the end first. Word count is 1,651 on my first draft. Now all I need to do is find someone to beta it for me; after I get the beginning done of course. The story itself is set in season 7 of Buffy and has a B/S pairing. Perhaps I should wait to outline the story until I know exactly where it's going. I'm off to bed now. I've spent most of the day on the comp. writing and the old eyes are getting a tad buggie and tired.

Inkblot test

I took a Inkblot test and here's what it said about me. Check it out if you're interested.Emode's Original Inkblot Test Akasha, your unconscious mind is driven most by Resistance You approach the world with your guard intact because unconsciously, and perhaps consciously, you want to maintain an element of control in your relationships with people. You tend to hold your private experiences just out of reach of others. You're not one to immediately show all your cards, to let people into who you really are until you're ready.Unfortunately, that sometimes means you also hide things from yourself. You may find that your desire to remain guarded backfires, affecting your self-awareness. Why are you like this? It's possible that you act in this manner because of a deeply-rooted fear of being exposed, or of truly expressing yourself. To protect yourself from this fear, you act in the opposite manner — you are guarded. There is a certain respect that comes with resistance, an unconscious understanding that the human psyche is very vulnerable. We all feel we have a lot to hide, and you are not one to be intrusive or thoughtless about how you approach sensitive topics with others. Therefore you inspire a sense of safety in others when they are around you. Your psyche is very deep, very rich, and the more you can let yourself know (both the good and the bad), the more you will be able to appreciate who you really are. Though your unconscious mind is driven most strongly by Resistance, there is much more to who you are at your core. Want to try it out yourself? http://www.emode.com/tests/inkblot/

Bits and Pieces

First off, I'll say that I enjoyed Buffy last night although I would have liked to have seen less of the SIT's and more of Spike. We got some Spuffy moments which are always nice albeit few and far between. I'm looking forward to the rest of the season.-------------------------------------------- I came across Jerry Springer while channel hopping the other day and, not unlike a train wreck, couldn't help but watch a bit. I swear I could feel my I.Q. dropping, moment by moment, as I watched. It seems to me that the show has resorted to hiring piss poor actors, given them a basic story line, and then asked them to adlib everything else, which they do terribly. Who actually watches this crap?--------------------------------------------- I was feeling a little creative the other morning and wrote another song inspired by the fact that I am unable to sing in front of people. It's called "The Great Divide" which, in my song, is a metaphor for all the things within ourselves that hold us back in life. In my case it's what holds me back from singing. If you're interested, here it is.The Great DivideFaithfading fastwhy won't it lastit's like a landslideFearI can't begincan't hold it init won't be deniedChorus:Looking outinto the Great Dividecan't help wonderingwhat's on the other sideI tried to jumpbut it was far too wideI couldn't get pastwhat it impliedDoubt creeping ina deadly sinof the worst kindNerveit falls awaywhy won't it stayit's been left behindChorus: x2

I am happy t...

I am happy to say that I learned how to use the mark up tags so I get the nice links instead of the long drawn out post. Very handy. I wish this damn cold I have would go away. I feel like I just might cough up a lung if I'm not careful. I had pneumonia last year and was given some prescription cough medicine that was terribly strong. At one point I didn't know if I was awake or asleep after taking it. I definitely do not want a repeat of that bit of nastiness.

100 Things About Me

I hear that some of the LJ folk like to include this type of info in their journals and I would like to also so I will add my list of 100 things about me. Read if you want but I can't promise you'll find it interesting.Hmmm... O.K., where to start? Well, I've lived in Ontario my whole life and somehow have never even left the province. (This I will have to amend soon.) I have never been to a concert.( Even though I love music) Ever. (No pity please. I will eventually) Addictions: Smoking, Caffeine, Buffy and, last but certainly not least, James Marsters.I recently quit drinking as I have found that causes more problems in my life then I care for. No, I'm not an alcoholic. I did drugs (nothing too heavy) in my early teens and have not touched them since nor do I like to be around those who do.I have a hysterical fear of bees. The kind that makes you run into speeding traffic or get into accidents if you think there's one in the car while you're driving. I have a bizarre dislike of feet. I don't like them on me, around me, near me or anything that sounds like the previous; and please don't clip your toenails where I can see you doing it. Eewwww!! I was raised Roman Catholic but am an Atheist. To quote a very wise man: " I go through life with the conviction that what is to be will be. I consciously follow a moral and truthful pattern, not because I fear the wrath of a conjured-up being 'who loves us all,' but because acting in a decent and humane manner towards my fellow beings is the civilized thing to do. When I depart this life I ask for no more than that I be remembered as a decent, moral human being, I will not experience eternal heavenly bliss (an awful bore), nor the eternal fires of Hell (a frightful, coercive invention) but quite simply an eternity of nothingness." End quote. This pretty much sums up my feelings on this subject and I am content in my beliefs (or non-beliefs, whatever). I have to sleep at least 8 hours followed by the mandatory 2 cups of coffee or I don't function properly. I have a fascination with vampire myth and lore etc. I guess I find the whole idea of staying young and living forever seductive. And we all know that the whole neck biting thing is just metaphor for sex, which I like. My favorite movie is "Interview With The Vampire." Why, you ask? See above. Plus, lots of eye candy for the ladies (and certain men). I mean who wouldn't want Lestat, Louis or Armand to bite them? My favorite TV show is "Buffy The Vampire Slayer." Why, you ask? Again, see above. Also, I am just in love with Spike. I love James Marsters even more though. Music. Well, I have an affinity for female vocalists. I like Jewel, Alanis Morissette, Sarah McLachlan, Jann Arden, Michelle Branch and others. Bands I like are Our Lady Peace, Led Zepplin, Barenaked Ladies, Aerosmith and many others I hear on the radio but don't know their names. I'm also really diggin' Ghost of the Robot (James Marsters' band). I have to add that I would have liked the music even if I had no idea who James Marsters was. I love it when a man wears the cologne Drakkar. It makes me all giddy and weak in the knees. *wink* Turn-on: Intellect, humor, confidence, nice teeth. Turn-off: Idiocy, conceit, people who worry too much about what others think, bad teeth. At different times in my life people have told me I look Alyssa Milano, the girl that played Jesse's wife on Full House and Alanis Moressete. Me, I don't think so. Must be the dark hair. I am very competitive and love to win but I'm not a sore loser. I have never met my father. My mother and I have almost no contact with each other. Mostly because she's not exactly all there. One sandwich short of a picnic I guess you could say. Other than my mother, I have no family to speak of.When it comes to expressing feelings in a relationship, I am more like the stereotypical man.I'm really into ancient history and can be found watching the learning channel if there's something on about pyramids or mummy's or some such thing.Although I am not religious I am fascinated by religion. It is truly amazing the things that people will do in the name religion or in the name of God.I play the guitar fairly well for someone who just picked one up a few months ago.I write songs complete with guitar tabs.If I had to choose a woman I would have gay sex with it would be Angelina Jolie. Why, you ask? She's beautiful and a little strange, ok, a lot strange but I find that interesting. Also, she's obviously not afraid to be herself. The last grade I finished in school was grade 8. Surprised? I hope so. I'd hate to think that you could notice my lack of schooling from this list.I love to read and own many, many books, all of which I've read at least once.My favorite author is Anne Rice. Yes, I know, vampires again.I love silver jewelry.My ears are pierced only once and I didn't have them done until I was 11.I have one tattoo on my right ankle of a rose which I would like to have changed. I got it when I was 13.I have plans to get at least 2 more tattoo's, maybe three. One on my lower back and perhaps, another very small one, on my left shoulder blade.I love video games although I haven't played any in some time. My favorite games are adventure/role-playing games.I work out at a gym 5 times a week and wish they had Pilates classes because I can't seem to make myself do it at home with the video.I am one of the few women I know of who knows how to turn of the water, gas, and electricity without having to call a man.I know my way around a workshop and can use a multitude of power tools.I know how to fish and can tie my own lines and bait my own hook (except the minnows, have a hard time of putting a hook through something that's looking at me).I get along with men better with women.I love to sing and can sing but couldn't sing in front of people if the fate of the free world depended on it (I'm working on this).I plan on taking acting classes in March.I love computers and seem to be a very quick study.I have owned almost every pet known to man at one time or another. My pet of choice right now is a ferret.I hope to meet James Marsters at Toronto Trek this summerOne of my weaknesses is that I'm terrible at math.I abhor menial chores and will never make a good housewife.I don't seem to like any of the people that I meet of late. I wonder if that says something about them or me?I have one very close friend whom I've know since I was 5. I rid myself of the other friends I had at 14 as they were going no where fast in life (drug use and the like) and have never bothered to make new ones.I don't put a lot of stock into what other people think about me as I feel it makes it hard to be true to yourself.I am neither a cat nor dog person. I like both equally.My favorite color is blue.My favorite number is 9.I love Italian food.Pretty much my whole wardrobe consists of clothes that are either black, white, blue or gray. I'm not exactly a fan of bright colorsI was once addicted to potato chips. I would sit and eat half of a big bag for breakfast until I realized they were going to make me fat. I haven't had chips in almost 2 years now (not including the odd one here and there).I would rather clean toilets than do dishes any day.I've been proposed to twice but am not married. The toilet paper roll goes on with the paper going over the top not down from behind.I do not like pop and prefer juice or milk and recently, water. If I have to choose, my choice is Coke over Pepsi (it's sweeter).I love the smell of Lilac and Easter Lilly's. I wish they'd make a perfume with the smell of mountain spring downy fabric softener.I am a Virgo and have most qualities of a Virgo excluding the extreme neatness.I can be a little obsessive/compulsive about some things. See the toilet paper roll issue above.I listen to my music too loudly and sing while I drive.I'm always right... lol.I have a nasty temper.I have a fear of flying. I've never been on a plane. Maybe one day.I've always wanted to write but I've never really finished anything in case I find I can't.This year I will have my last birthday as I don't want to get any older (I'm 24).I come across, to most, as confident and sure of myself but I have moments of insecurity and self doubt more often than they know.Sometimes I lack the courage of my convictions. Only sometimes.I am tossing around the idea of writing some Buffy fan fic.A few places I would like to visit: New Orleans, Ireland and specifically the Pyramids and Stonehenge. Getting there might present a problem. I may have to rethink the fear of flying bit.I believe there is life out there, other than us. In a universe as vast as ours, well, there's got to be something. An amoeba even. I'm not so sure they've been here though. I mean, come on, that whole anal probing thing and the crop circles seem a bit ridiculous don't ya think? I once took a Proprioceptive Writing workshop. It's interesting. Look it up sometime. It helps to get some stuff out and gives you a little incite into just how that brain of yours works. Basically, the idea is to write exactly what comes to mind no matter what it is; see where it leads you.I can sometimes have a bit of an inferiority complex when it comes to my intellect. Not finishing school can do that to ya. On the bright side I do go out of my way on occasion to learn many things.I have a terrible habit of interrupting because I'm afraid that I'll forget what I was going to say when it's my turn. You always forget the best stuff too.I seriously think I may be allergic to house cleaning.I am a INTP/J. This personality type, either way, makes up only 1% of the population. If you've ever read the book "Please Understand Me" you'll know what I'm talking about. If you haven't it's an interesting read and I highly recommend it.I've never had a filling. Ever. Dental hygiene is important.I know how to knit and crochet as well as sew. Now, I don't do it often mind you.When I was little I used to play cards for money. So what if it was crazy eights, I won.I kick ass at Trivial Pursuit. I have a multitude of useless knowledge and I am able to remember celebrities names which helps in the entertainment category.I am pessimist with optimistic tendencies.I can sleep no matter what is going on around me or in my life. The world could be ending tomorrow but I will still get my 8hrs. in and feel refreshed and ready for the apocalypse. I know... it's a gift.I like to think that I'm funny despite the fact that not everyone agrees all the time.I'm very stubborn and sometimes it can take a lot to change my views on things.I hope to win the lottery one day and live the rest of my days filthy stinkin' rich.Contradictions can drive me to insanity.I've actually driven 1 block to get a news paper because I was too lazy to walkMy biggest fear is of dying with the thought that I did nothing with my life.I hope to one day make a living in some kind of artistic endeavor.I use the online name "Akasha" because she is strong, beautiful and confident albeit a tad evil but no one is perfect. Also, she's a vampire; the queen of the damned.I hate it when people beat around the bush about things... just get to the point already!When I was really little I used to have a dream that continued, night after night, right from the point where it left off, that there were 2 of me, one of which could fly.I have learned that going ice fishing on the coldest days of the year will earn you the respect of men more than anything else you do in everyday life.I AM CANADIAN!!I hate it when people use the bible to condone and even aid themselves in their persuits of racisim and bigotry.Something weird: My brain sometimes thinks with an English accent.A little thought on life: Never be afraid to be yourself. You are the only you there is, you are unique and you have something no one else has... your point of view. Well, I guess that's about it. You can take me or leave me. It's up to you.

Quotes

I thought I'd add some of my favorite quotes:Reality is perception.Perceptions change.Reality is fluid.So if by "reality" you mean reliably, tangibleobjects and immutable events, thenthere is no such thing.~Dean Koontz from the book "Ticktock"~The next 2 are from the movie "As Good As It Gets"A woman asks Jacks character how he writes women so well and he responds with:"I think of a man and I take away reason and accountability"Now, as a woman, I find this statment mildly offensive but the writers did good with this one."Go sell crazy somewhere else; were all stocked up here."I'll think of some more later.